12 February 2010

Outraged Feminists Protest Angrily Outside Brian Wang's Silicon Valley Offices

Angry feminists are staging 24 hour protests outside the Silicon Valley offices of noted blogger Brian Wang. Al Fin -- disguised as an ugly woman in order to fit in, and speaking in a falsetto pitch -- managed to interview a few of the protestors. Approaching a small cluster of particularly angry-looking feminists:

AF (holding up a clenched fist):Equality! What is this all about, sisters?

Bambi: We're protesting that sexist pig Brian Wang! He's promoting the genocide of females on his blog.

AF: Disgusting! Where can I read what that sexist pig says?

Dawn: It's all right there in black and white! Read it for yourself.

AF (reading the webpage on Bambi's IPhone): You mean here where he talks about a laser that can be programmed to kill only female mosquitoes?

Candi: That's right! It leaves the males alone and only kills the females! Sexist pig!

AF: But only female mosquitoes bite and spread diseases like malaria and yellow fever. What harm can the males do if there are no females left to breed with? Besides, they're only mosquitoes.

Dawn: Sure, they start with just mosquitoes. Then they move up the animal chain to human females. It always starts innocently enough.

AF: What do you plan to do to Brian Wang? He is only reporting the story. He's just a blogger, albeit quite widely-read and well respected.

Bambi: We've got to make an example out of anyone who is willing to spread the news of this sexist genocide without condemning it outright. He's just so damned clinical about it, as if it were a good thing! He's got to pay -- Hey! That looks like beard stubble under your makeup! (grabs at AF's crotch)

AF (dancing nimbly out of reach): Thank you so much for expressing your point of view, sisters. Equality! (hurries away to getaway car)

Mr. Myhrvold said he thinks there is particular potential in the Blu-ray laser technology, because blue lasers are more powerful than red ones and there are a lot of them being made cheaply now.

He estimates that the devices could potentially cost as little $50, depending on the volume of demand. However, his company would not manufacture them. Rather, it built the technology mostly as a proof of concept. (Among other things, his company is also working on cooking technology.) Other companies would have to take the laser technologies to market, so the timeline for seeing the lasers in common use is uncertain.

The laser detection is so precise that it can specify the species, and even the gender, of the mosquito being targeted. “The women are bigger. They beat at a lower frequencies,” Mr. Myhrvold said. Since it is only the female mosquitoes who bite humans, for the sake of efficiency, his system would leave the males alone. _BrianWang

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1 Comments:

Blogger Yordan Georgiev said...

You left one important detail:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpQDFhwUjDE

Saturday, 13 February, 2010  

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“During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act” _George Orwell

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